Luke Lyons' Account

I'll post all my comments on your project here.

I'm going to start by saying you must be very proud of your drawings and model, it shows. But if that's the case, then you owe it to yourself to spell check, or proof read your notes to us reviewers. It may sound old school, but English is a form of communication just like drawing and modeling and when you speak talk draw or model, people will be judging. Too may errors!!!!

The scheme however is nice and professional and its unfortunate you couldn't blend the presentation with the digital realm, but that's coming right? You will be called upon to merge your schematic ideas with the technical reality of architectural space and construction. I think you have the skills and fortitude to put it all together. Good luck.

I assume this is a mistake- the same photo and caption. Watch out for these kinds of errors as they suggest you are not paying close enough attention.

Very nice design thinking. I like that you are thinking about the overall sense of community. Certainly a second floor risks isolation from the lower floor. Very nice job.

Good use of model Luke but I believe this is the same photograph you used earlier. Use your model to it's full potential. Maybe a bird's eye view or a plan view of the model would be more informative.

Again, nice use of physical models to help explore spatial solutions. I assume the staircase will have a handrail? Back to my earlier comment about the background. The green wall behind your model is so intense I find it hard not looking at it.....you want my focus to be entirely on the model so try to take the photo in a less cluttered and neutral background.

THis is great to see. I have looked at many proposals and none of them have included physical models. Architects and designers rely heavily on physical models to work through ideas so I salute on the use of them and encourage you to use them as much as possible. In the future try to photograph the model close to natural light (this will give you more pronounced shadows- especially with fome core) and make sure there is nothing in the background if possible. Any distractions draw our attention away from where you want it to be.

Nice simple flow diagram to think about the traffic patterns through the space. Oftentimes, simple (low-fidelity) drawings like these are the most direct. Technical drawings always suggest that decisions have been made. In the data collecting phase it's good to keep it simple and direct.

Great! I'm happy to see you using visuals over your photos to call our attention to the heaters. Arrows can also be effective. I often blur out the areas I don't want a client to see- this forces their attention where I want it. Watch the spelling (attract has 2 't's') Otherwise a very good job!

Very nice descriptive photo. Photography is a great way to document existing spaces- feel free to annotate in Photoshop if you find it useful. You can call out areas that you want the viewer to pay attention to with simple arrows or text boxes.

Good dimensioning Luke! Yes, I'd pay very close attention to any spelling or grammar errors. These are the first things people often notice and then assume you are not as attentive to the details as you could be. It's really a sign of professionalism and while you are still in high school this is as good a time as any.